Are you struggling to get engagement from your team in meetings and day-to-day communications? Do you find yourself leading discussions, only to be met with silence or superficial participation?
Here’s a hard truth: If you're always talking, your team doesn't have space to contribute—and over time, they’ll stop trying altogether.
Too many leaders equate facilitation with control. They enter meetings with a clear problem, a ready-made solution, and a monologue to deliver. Then they wonder why their teams are passive and disengaged.
The answer is simple: collaboration requires oxygen. If you’re filling the room with your voice, there's no air left for others to breathe life into the conversation.
Instead of controlling discussions, aim to influence through inclusion. Structure conversations so that your team must engage in order for progress to happen. Set the tone with curiosity, not certainty.
Don't be scared of silence. Silence can be a sign that your team is thinking, processing, and preparing to contribute. If you fill every pause with your own voice, you’re robbing them of the chance to engage. Embrace the power of silence and give your team the space to think. Be patient.
The power of silence is a tool that can help you:
Did you know that Jeff Bezos famously uses a six-page memo instead of PowerPoint slides? This forces his team to read and think before discussing. It’s a brilliant way to ensure everyone is on the same page and ready to engage.
Can you imagine sitting quietly in a meeting while everyone reads a six-page memo? If you can't, this is a sign that your team is used to being talked at, not talked with.
Even if the problem and solution seem obvious to you, your job as a leader isn't to solve—it’s to lead others to the solution.
Ask leading questions. Be genuinely curious. Let your team talk through the problem before you drop hints about your own ideas. If the conversation veers off course, gently steer it back by slow-dripping your insight—don’t flood the room with it.
This creates a collaborative environment where:
Think of leadership like captaining a ship. You're responsible for setting the direction, not adjusting every sail.
Let your crew handle the logistics. If you're always steering the wheel, your team will never learn how.
Over-involvement in execution erodes ownership. Under-involvement in guidance leads to drift. Great leaders find the balance—empowering the team while keeping the mission clear.
In Turn the Ship Around! by Ret. Capt. David Marquet (a book I recommend to every leader), Marquet introduces the concept of intent-based leadership. Instead of information flowing upward for approval, authority flows downward to where the information lives.
This flips the old model on its head:
Don’t make all the decisions yourself—empower your team to make them.
This unlocks distributed leadership, increases autonomy, and enables high performance. When people feel ownership, they act like owners.
If you’re trying to turn a ship around—whether it’s your team culture, your communication habits, or your leadership approach—start by creating space for your crew to thrive. Ask, listen, empower, and guide.
And if you haven’t yet, give Turn the Ship Around! a read. It might just help you chart a better course.